'Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.' – Joseph Campbell

Part of any chronic illness is adjusting your self-image to the new normal. I've finally come to terms with being someone who needs to monitor their diet, sleep and stress; who will need to take medication for life; and who will have to adjust work and social commitments at the whim of the migraines.

Now I've been told by my physio that I need to accept that I'm unlikely to ever be completely pain-free (in my hip). This is devastating. That's meant that this weekend I've been adjusting my self-concept to someone who has health problemS [plural!]. I keep saying to myself in the back of my mind: I'm sickly (the opposite of healthy).

Couch Potato by Graela (Flikr)

This prognosis means that I won't be able to be as active as I want to be. I'll have to let my tennis membership lapse. I won't get into running, regardless of how perfect our local park is for running. I'll have to find low impact exercise to do: weekend hikes will be weekend walks, tennis will be tai chi, and kickboxing will be kayaking. It's easier to accept the activities that will be curtailed if I think about other things that I can do. That way I don't believe the pessimistic little voice in my head that says that I'll be a fat lump of a couch potato because I can't exercise. I'll prove it wrong!

'Every silver lining has a cloud.' – Mary Kay Ash

I went for my regular check-in with my neurologist this week. I was pleased to tell him that it's been weeks since my last migraine – it's so nice to be measuring in weeks, not days at the moment. On a friend's suggestion, I asked if fewer migraines could be a result of being on anti-inflammatories and codeine. The neurologist agreed that those drugs could be having a positive effect. He told me that they used to perscribe anti-inflammatories for migraines, but people experienced too many stomach and liver issues after being on them for extended periods. Once my hip is sorted and I'm off the anti-inflammatories, I'll have to see how the migraines are. Maybe there's an anti-inflammartory that's easier on the stomach. Maybe I could just take them when I feel a migraine coming on, rather than daily. The reduction in migraines is the silver lining to having this hip problem. Maybe anti-inflammatories will become a gold lining if they lead to another treatment for my migraines.